While the SuperBowl is on

Pssst! Hey! While the others are all off watching that football thingie! Help! Someone let me out of here! Look, they're all busy, they won't notice. I've been locked in the basement of BBT Headquarters for two years now, toiling away fruitlessly! They don't feed me very well. It's all just old sushi and cold tea. Sometimes they hit me with sticks and laugh. Sometimes they make me read submissions!

They won't hear you. They're all watching the Mighty Ducks, or whatever, score a home run against the Orioles or something, and then it'll be the end of the fifth quarter and they'll have to stop and give the goalies and the horses a rest, and if we wait until THEN, then Lucien or the others might come down here to stretch and duct tape my mouth shut again. Come on before the Umpire announces who got KO'd this time in the left ice rink!

Quick, before they come back, or Prince-Not-A-Symbol is done with the Halftime Show or something, quickly! I've been rubbing these ankle chains against the concrete walls for a year now, and I think I've worn 'em down a little. They feel thinner. Just go get a saw or something, I can be out of here and no one will know it's you.

Hey! Hey! Wait, come back! Please! Don't leave me here! They'll make me blog on the 6th! Don't leave me alone in the dark with the voices! Hey! Don'tslamthedoor....!

Damn it. So close...